Anyway, to move away from my bitching about feminism and onto the actual point of this blog...
I very much enjoyed The Golden Notebook, as usual, not so much based on the content of the book, but the voice behind it. I think I am in love with Ms. Doris Lessing. She mentioned a lot of things in the introductions that I simply adore. She's like a wise grandmother talking to you in complete honesty about her life experiences, and as a woman who has never had the kind of relationship or capabilities to speak in such an intimate way with her familial superiors, it was very refreshing and strange at the same time. It was kind of like talking to the me of the future, as so much of what Lessing wrote related to my own ideas. She does mention that she had received countless letters from fans of both sexes thanking her for this very notion, and I think that's very impressive in and of itself. I like this advice:
"Remember that the book which bores you when you are twenty or thirty will open doors for you when you are forty or fifty -- and vice versa. Don't read a book out of its right time for you."
The book was sometimes hard to follow because of the way it was split up. The format was an overarching story titled "Free Women" divided up into 5 parts, as well as four separate notebooks written by the protagonist on different subjects. I think I will go back and read the "Free Women" segments together as one immediately after I write this post, but otherwise I can generally say that I liked the black notebook best (about young English do-gooders in Africa), followed by the yellow one (a reflection of the Free Women parts). I like them best because they are the ones that are narrative and tell a story, whereas the red notebook was hard to understand for me because I know little about communism and the political values that were discussed there. The blue notebook's (a personal diary) purpose seemed to recount the process in which Anna started going mad, and I am slightly turned off by the topic of a character going mad at this point, since by now it is starting to be somewhat of a recycled theme.
Lessing is a very good writer. She seems to know exactly what she's doing, and takes a pretty no-bullshit approach without being annoying which I respect. It's truly the only book I've ever read that speaks in a frank way from the point of view of a woman that doesn't seem outwardly fictitious or sugary with female propaganda -- but again, I emphasize that I say this having avoided feminist writing in the past.
I should mention I moved to Ohio a little over a month ago to follow a dream. I got a job at a fashion retailer as a copywriter and although it has left me in solitude for now, I stand my ground about doing my best at being a "strong" woman and doing what it takes to reach what I want. This is not feminism, this is just being a person with conviction. It has nothing to do with sex. Being realistic about my life is something I try to maintain, and luckily I am doing better these days at having more hope so maybe it will translate in real life.
"'We've got to remember that people with our kind of experience are bound to be depressed and unhopeful.'
'Or perhaps it's precisely people with our kind of experience who are most likely to know the truth, because we know what we've been capable of ourselves?'"
Hopefully my path leads me to greater things. I suppose the core theme of this storyline is the fear of being alone and I can definitely relate to that. I am not quite happy yet, but I am trying to get there:
"I remember saying to myself, This is it, this is being happy, and at the same time I was appalled because it had come out of so much ugliness and unhappiness."
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